The Father’s Blessing by Bryan Craig
You are a reflection of the face of God and the world shines brighter for the joy you give me this day. I bless you, my child. (Excerpt from The Blessing Stone by Michael John Poirier)
A friend of mine, a fellow Journey Guide, went to be with the Lord a few weeks ago, and he was only 52 years old. He left behind a faithful wife and four wonderful children. As I attended his funeral, it reminded me of what I already knew… that he was so devoted to his children and their biggest coach and challenger, but also their biggest encourager. What really got me was a few days later when his daughter posted a tribute to her dad on social media. The pictures were of her and her Dad, but the audio she overlayed was not a song, but rather a voicemail her dad had left her, telling her how proud he was of her and how much he loved her. Her Dad’s words had obviously meant so much to her that she saved that voice mail. It broke my heart but also reminded me of the importance of blessing my children.
You have probably heard about “The Father’s Blessing.” It is written into our DNA to desire the blessing of our fathers. Going back to the beginning of time, Adam sought God’s blessing and was ashamed when sin caused a separation between he and God. Jacob so wanted his father Isaac’s blessing that he deceived him, acting like he was his brother Esau. Consider also the competition between Jacob’s sons as they saw him favoring Joseph, which caused them to sell their brother into slavery. Or David, who was somewhat of the outcast in his father Jesse’s eyes. Jesse paraded all of his other sons in front of Samuel, who was searching for the next king of Israel. David, this unassuming, faithful shepherd boy, was one blessing away from an amazing life of influence. And lastly, think about Jesus’ parable of the Lost Son who squandered his father’s inheritance in wild living, yet when he returned, his father forgave him and blessed him. The father also had another son who seemed to be the good son, who did everything right. Yet, this son felt dismissed and unappreciated. The Father blessed him as well.
We who are fathers must take heed and realize that we have an inheritance to pass down. It is not a material inheritance, but rather, a blessing of Love, that our children are craving. And our inheritance comes from Father God, who loves us unconditionally and who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing, and Who gave us his Son, our brother, who died for us, to show us how much He loves us.
Many fathers invest in their children, raising them up and training them with various skills. They may teach their kids how to change a tire or change their oil or how to develop a good work ethic. They may coach their sports teams and challenge them to be better, stronger and more disciplined. Those are great things and they tend to be appreciated every Father’s Day in the cards that are given to dads.
However, I believe what every son and daughter wants from their Dad is to hear words spoken to them like:
“I love you.”
“I’m proud of you.”
“You are doing a great job.”
“You are a wonderful, nurturing Mom. Your kids are so fortunate to have you.”
“I see the way you are raising your kids, and you are such a good spiritual leader.”
“You are really gifted. You’ve got talent.”
“Wow! I can’t believe I get to be your father.”
“You bring me great joy.”
Interestingly, I watched two documentaries lately that highlighted this for me. One was on the life of Billy Joel. As you watch it, you really appreciate his musical genius and creativity, and you learn that he got his musical genes from his Dad, who was a classical pianist. And as you hear Billy Joel talk about his Dad, you can tell that, despite all his fame and fortune and success, he still longed for Dad’s affirmation and approval, but he never got it. Interestingly, the other documentary was about Charlie Sheen who was a self-admitted prodigal son, who had many struggles with drugs, alcohol, women, etc. His Dad, another famous movie star, Martin Sheen, declined to be interviewed for this documentary, but Charlie Sheen clearly said that through it all, his Dad was there for him, fighting every step of the way. Wow!
At the outset of this blog, I included a quote from a story I heard told years ago, called “The Blessing Stone” where a man, who wasn’t blessed by his father, learns how to change that for his kids. When my kids were little, I would speak this blessing over them when I put them to bed. You are a reflection of the face of God and the world shines brighter for the joy you give me this day. I bless you my child. At first, it was a bit uncomfortable for them and me, even though they were little girls, but as I saw the big smile on their faces, I knew it was speaking to a deeper part of them.
Scripture is also clear that we can bless our children, or we can curse them. Exodus 20:5-6 tells us that sins of the Fathers are passed down to the third and fourth generation, but that Love is passed down to a thousand generations. What do you want to pass down to your kids, grandkids and great grandkids?
I’ve told this story before, but years ago, I was giving a talk to 5th grade boys and their dads at a Christian school, and I asked all the boys to come on stage. I told the dads I needed their help in blessing their boys. Our mascot was the “Patriots” and I had spent time talking about how a patriot is a warrior, a man who does what is right even when everyone else is doing wrong, a man of integrity, honor, etc. So, I told them I wanted them to come up front when it was their son’s turn. I brought some anointing oil, and I asked them to anoint their son’s forehead with oil and say their name and say, “You are a Patriot!” The dads started to squirm a bit in their seats, but my biggest question was how the 5th grade boys would react. I thought they might be embarrassed for their dads to do something like this in front of other boys. Much to my surprise, the boys were fighting to get to the front of the line.
Father after father got up from their seat, looking their son in the eyes, anointed him with oil and affirmed him as a “Patriot.” It was a beautiful God-ordained moment to witness. And watching these interactions, I could quickly tell which of these dads were already doing this at home, as it came natural and easy. For others, the awkwardness was evident. But Praise God that perhaps this was a wake-up call or a starting point of something. But I bet if I got to know those dads who struggled with it, I would find out that their dads didn’t bless them.
Fellow Influencers, may we be Fathers of Blessing to our children, no matter how old they are. This is something we can never do enough. Regardless of how we were blessed or cursed in our past, may we pass on The Heavenly Father’s blessing of love to our kids and grandkids and turn the tide on generational sin which the enemy would love for us to pass down.
Start today. Bless your children. Talk to them. Hug them. Tell them you love them. Send them a text or an audio text. Write them a letter. Whatever it takes. Just don’t remain silent, leaving the enemy any opportunity for them to doubt our love. This is one of the most important ministries God has entrusted to you.